I'm not related to these students. Not really friend's of any of the parents. I have no affiliation with these 16 & 17 year-old kids outside of being one of their high school teachers. I see them less than 5 hours a week for 9 months.
And yet this week. I had a girl ask me for a tampon. A student saying "hi" to their BFF walking down the hallway waving both middle fingers in the air. And one student confessing their parents are getting a divorce, therefore, they are allowed to walk all over their mom because, frankly, in the kid's eyes, the kid doesn't have to respect their parents since her parents' marriage is over.
Now, you may say that these are just anomalies. Random situations, in one week, throughout the course of a school year. I don't want to burst your bubble of optimism, but I'm here to tell you. . . it's a trend. High school is a microcosm of the American culture. We are becoming casual, and perhaps too casual?
There's a veil that's been lifted between teacher and student. And that's not all bad. That's for another blog post. This post is about the slippery slope. When each can NOT distinguish their roles it can be scary and lead to a world of Trouble. As an educator, I am to teach. To enlighten. Facilitate. Guide. Direct. It isn't my responsibility to be their friend. A counselor or mentor, sure. But I'm not supposed to be their friend while they are attending secondary school.
I replied to the student whom asked for the tampon. "I'm sorry. You need to go see the nurse." And quickly scribbled a pass to the clinic.
The student who was double flipping off her friend in the hallway, I tapped her on the shoulder and told her it was inappropriate. She replied, "I was just saying 'hi'." Then, assumedly after reading my blank expression, the student quickly added a muffled, "Sorry." She scurried off towards her next class.
And to the student whom declared she didn't have to respect her mom because of the divorce. I simple said, "Your mom carried you in her belly for 9 months and more than likely endured excruciating pain to get you into this world. Not to mention, she's been half the reason you've had all your needs met to this point in your life. Both your parents have earned your respect. And if you fail to give it to them, then that's on you."
Don't get me wrong, I appreciate the opportunities that present themselves outside the lectures and activities of academia to give input and teach life lessons. Maybe I'm just here to tell you as someone not in the trenches of public education, we're losing ground on the respect front. Expectations are lessening and the students are breaking those expectations down even further. Nothing is sacred. Or at least, rarely sacred. I'm not sure if we can reverse the trend. I'm not sure how to unteach what has been taught by a consistent allowance of ill-respect. It's merely an observation and a question. Can we become too casual?
